When I first started blogging, I wrote a post titled ‘5 things you should never say or do‘. It was pretty fun to write, so I thought I’d follow up with a similar post. I wanted to share 6 things you should never tell an introvert. Sadly, I’ve lost count of how many times these things have been said to me. However, I’m finally at the point where I can brush these kinds of comments off. I hope you can see the humour in these as well.
1. Why are you always so serious?
You may find this hard to believe, but I’m not. I love having fun. However, my definition of fun differs from that of extroverts. Also, the reason you’ve never seen me having fun is probably because I’m not comfortable enough around you to let loose.
2. You need to be more outgoing.
Just because I don’t loudly introduce myself to everyone in the room doesn’t mean I lack social skills. I’ll do things at my own pace. I refuse to sacrifice my self-worth to conform to the way you think I should behave.
3. You over-think things too much.
Obviously you don’t think enough if you thought this was acceptable to say to me. Thinking and analyzing is a natural part of how my mind works. Its a subconscious process and not something that I can, or want to, change.
4. Asking ‘what’s wrong’ when we’re quiet.
I really appreciate that you’re concerned about how I’m feeling. However, my lack of speech doesn’t mean I’m sad or upset. I just don’t talk unless its necessary or I have something I want to share. Often, I simply have nothing to contribute to the conversation. In some cases, I’m bored. Please don’t take it personally.
5. Don’t be shy.
Trust me, I’m not. Being quiet doesn’t mean I’m shy. Shyness is fear of social situations. I enjoy socialization in small bites, as long as I have the energy. Its not okay to tell me to change myself because you don’t approve of something.
6. You’re never any fun.
You’re saying that you don’t accept me for who I am. This one cuts really deep. You’d prefer it if I acted like someone else. As introverts, it may take some time and trust, but you’ll find that we’re extremely interesting people. To be judged on one aspect of our character (our ‘fun-ness’) is very hurtful.
Do you have any other things you shouldn’t tell an introvert?